“BLACKOUT TOMMY FINDS TRUE FREEDOM IN CHRIST JESUS”
I’d been locked up for about eight months. I got off the bus at Stanley Correctional Institute back to state prison on revocation for forgery and check fraud. I was on an intake unit for about a week, and then I got moved to unit one. There was an old man there named Arlyn who came up to me and began talking about the Bible and Bible studies. He showed me the list and how to sign up. I did a couple of studies on the unit and went to some at the chapel. I didn't like the fellowship groups because it seemed that all the people were fake. so I stopped going to them but I went to the church services. In August, there is a church service by Randy and Elizabeth Davenport, the message in the word by Elizabeth was very inspiring and I can remember her saying the quote that “Missouri is the show me state”, God has inspired me in that moment.
When I was leaving I picked up a tract from Scott Heburn, the newsletter Saved by Grace as well as a tract by Dr. Mickey Park. I had been to Chapel several times and those tracts weren't there before. A change took place and I began reading the Bible and those two tracts stuck with me as I read them again and again and memorized the scriptures shared. I wrote Scott Heburn, while I was waiting for a letter back I also wrote to the newsletter Saved by Grace and Mickey Park . On the way to put the letter in the mailbox I stopped and talked to Arland I told him I was mailing the letter and he had a 76 page resource packet so he let me look at that for days, writing down addresses even though I didn't have many stamps. I eventually got a reply letter from Scott with some encouraging words into one page Bible studies. A couple of days later, I got a reply from Dr. Mickey Park then I wrote Mickey again by middle of September and I had received his book Stepping Stones to Freedom, and I was even more inspired.
My wife had ordered me 30 stamp envelopes from the vendor catalog so I wrote letters for Bible studies and books, I got signed up for hobby drawing and I ordered some coloring pencils, I told Mickey about that and that it was a good way to relax before studying. He ordered the Amazing Grace adult coloring book and a book called the faces of Jesus for me. That was really cool. then I read his tract and book again. Lots of Bible studies had started coming in the mail. Lighthouse Ministries sent me a Bible concordance dictionary. I was also doing Christian Library International Bible Studies and they sent a resource list. One of the books given was, “I’ll Bury You” by Vince Neil and I found that it was very good and influential. I cannot list all of the studies given, but that one was a personal favorite. Chapel Library and Mount Zion Bible study from Pensacola was a big help.
I set up the emails on the kiosk, it was something new to me to be able to email from prison. I entered the email from the back of Mickey Park’s book and he emailed me back. I was excited about the emails, it was a true blessing to hear from someone from the outside about the word of God and the grace of Jesus Christ. I consider Mickey as my mentor and I pray that Set Free to Serve Ministry blooms. He does a lot to try and help me find the Lord and to be released and stay free.
Today it is October 31st, and I am still in prison waiting for a court date, November 13th to see what happens. The release date is January 2nd, 2018. I am hoping nothing changes at court. I spend my days reading and studying the Bible. I just received Scott Heburn’s book “A New Life” so I will begin to read that. The next 60 days I will spend that time with the Lord preparing to walk out the door and walk with Jesus hand in hand to a new life of my own.
I am hoping the experience of the book Jailhouse Religion by Stephen Canup and all the encouragement from Dr. Mickey Park will help me succeed and make it through probation without returning. This is my testimony about how I have come to know Christ, how I became a new creation (2 Corinthians 5:16-17), after being born again (John 3:3), and all that lead me to daily prayer.
I don’t like to talk about the old me, before July 2017 arriving at Stanley. My own life before then was based on Romans 3:23. It was horrible and not something to relive. I was born a sinner. I was a thief, a liar, a drinker, and addicted to drugs. It was when I was at Stanley that I read Romans 6:23 that lead me to John 3:3 and my favorite scripture, 2 Corinthians 5:16-17.
I got my first DUI at 16 years old, one month after getting my license. My third DUI I got in Kentucky in January of 2001. I don’t want to glorify or make it seem cool. I ended up in the Wisconsin prison system in August of 2009 for arson. I was released in December of 2012. I was on several P.O. holds for retail thefts. On December 23rd, 2013 I was arrested at the probation office and scheduled to be released January 2nd, 2018. That depends on the result of the the 6 counts of felony forgery and 8 counts of misdemeanor theft.
That was me, the old me who did whatever the easiest way seemed to be. Instead of working and buying food or clothes, I would fill a car and run. It was a big mistake and I was living reckless and dangerous. I discovered at the age of 11 that I was born an alcoholic, I couldn’t drink without blacking out. Tested over and over again. I was sober for two years and one shot of whiskey turns me into acting crazy and out of control. They called me “Blackout Tommy.” Then add in someone who cared about me or others that try to stop me and it always just made matters worse and a big fight and disaster every time.
In my addiction I had no shame. That is where my life had hit the rock bottom of addiction, when you wake up in your own puke and the house is all destroyed from your drunken rampage. It was like nothing mattered, it was just my normal doped up drunk life. Nothing embarrassed me, I could be drunk in Walmart walking around and someone just say excuse me and I’d cuss them out and try and start a fight. Drunk and crazy out of my mind full of anger, bitterness, hate and chaos. My life a life of darkness and total chao, deep in addiction.
From June 1998 to October 2000 I was arrested 13 times for public drunkeness. One time with no shirt, another time with just me and my underwear.. My life was totally out of control. Alcohol and dope was in total demonic control. Depression was a big reason for my drinking. Yet drinking only made matters worse. My dad died wiht I was 12, and both my grand pa’s when I was 16. I have attempted suicide over 100 times. I was crazy drunk on Jim Beam and Jack Daniels, I smoked pot and I‘d take any and every pill given me up to 20 pills at time and wash it down with whiskey or a swig of beer. A addict with a Capital “A”.
I was in the hospital for an overdose one time. I had tried to set myself on fire while I had been doing cocaine for 3 months. They tell me I mumbled “no one cares” and I went over and grabbed a lighter and sit down and lit my shirt on fire and they had to put out the flames and fire.
Nobody wanted to drink or party with me and they didn’t want me around. They all were partying and having fun, I was too far, too deep, too dark, too damaged, to psyco even for them.
Monday’s was the the Monday Nitro Party, and I ruined many keg parties sitting outside by the fire drinking wild and crazy when I’d take my shirt off and just throw it in the fire. My life just a hot mess of confusion consumed by the flames of addiction.
From my prison experience I came to realize It wasn’t Jim Beam or Jack Daniels that I really needed in my life, it was JESUS CHRIST, and I found that He can satisfy the thirst that nothing and no one else ever could. In Christ Jesus I found the Love, Hope and Mercy I needed, I found the GRACE and sweet Forgiveness of GOD that heals the brokenness of my heart and life. BlackOut Tommy, found True Freedom in CHRIST JESUS. Praise GOD, JESUS SET’S THE CAPTIVES FREE. Jn. 8:36 If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed. Like the Demonic man chained and shackled I have been Set Free, Redeemed, and Delivered and now sober, clothed and in my right mind. My friend there is a Real Jesus who changes Real Lives. Tommy Hicks (Blackout Tommy is living proof).